Dear Mark ...
Sorry that it's taken a minute to get back you. But you were forced to change your phone numbers after that tacky Paris Hilton-Sidekick fiasco. The nerve of some people!
Today there's some good news and bad news. The bad news: did not attend this week's screening.
But the good news: Tonight, let's have a threesome with Dwayne! First I'll spend 1hr 50mns with you, then another 2hr 5mns with him. How does that sound?
Great. See you at the UA later tonight!